These are gold.
"so I sprayed them with febreze"
people who exercise in order to get rid of period cramps are the ones surviving the apocalypse.
Mi papá tiene 47 años= my dad is 47 years old
Mi papa tiene 47 anos= my potato has 47 assholes
I love spanish
A capital letter changes it even further:
Mi Papa tiene 47 anos = My pope has 47 anuses
literally the best post I have seen on this website
but why do famous people get things for free if they’re the ones that can afford it
my mating call is the sound of my microwave beeping
I almost forgot my briefcase!
it contains important lab results
my mom and I got into an argument one time and then we started getting really emotional and she said “Obama means family” and I swear I never cried so hard in my life
WAIT IT’S SUPPOSED TO SAY OHANA NOT OBAMA THE PRESIDENT ISN’T PULLING MY FAMILY TOGETHER